The Never Ending Pursuit

    I'm looking around at the yard, trying to decide what to do next and I'm faced with the reality that it is all going crazy, I don't have enough containers, enough dirt or enough yard!  It's such a wonderful problem to have.

    I see babies coming up everywhere, stuff I want to move but I'm making myself leave it.  The canna lillies are blooming like crazy and there are small tubers underneath everywhere you look.  Ten plants turned into thirty something!  

    It's so exciting and fun for me.  All this creating has created a heaven I never knew I could live in.

    I never knew I needed this.

    I've been dead heading flowers for the seeds, all the while more seeds are pouring into my mailbox and my big plan for next summer is tons of orange marigolds.  I'm going to plant more sunflower seeds as soon as I move the banana trees that aren't doing well in that spot.  All the information says they will still grow and produce flowers.  The sun flowers get so tall and give off seed for the next season.

    I'm waiting for the rest of my winter crop seeds to come in, so I can get them in some dirt before the end of the month.  I have to take them elsewhere because there just isn't room here.  It's a burning desire deep in my soul, it frightens and excites me all at the same time.

    I learned so much this year!  I made so many mistakes!  I'm still learning and the watermelons are doing well.

    I keep painting things to distract myself and give the flowers their full season.  I want to do other things but I'm having to practice patience.  I'm pretty sure I have cucumbers and cantaloupes coming up all over again, after cleaning out those beds and turning the soil.  This also means those things have to be moved and to be honest I'm not interested in cucumbers again because I don't have the space to store them and they take over completely, choking other plants along the way.  I'm going to transplant them into pots and take them over where the farm will be this next go round.

    I have obviously created a monster.  LOL.

    When the watermelons are finished, I'm going to clear that area out and move canna lillies and banana trees there, so they will grow tall and shade the cage in the mornings.  I'm also thinking of moving the pots at the back of the cage and moving stuff there, problem is he'll hike his leg and piss on them.  I don't want him being able to see the cats that roam around behind the trailer.  He's such a nosey neighbor, I swear.

    I still have two brand new storage buildings in the box, sitting in front of his cage.  Damn it!  It is what it is.  I have to have two pieces of 8x6 plywood to make the floors.  I promised the oldest boy one if he'd help me put the other one together.  I can use it for a greenhouse over the winter, if we can get that done.

    I've never in my life been happier and I say that with a big shit eating grin plastered to my face.

    I love this choice I made so much!  

My Happy Place

 She calls to me, minute by minute, hour by hour.

Darlene, come and play in me.  Find something to do or change.

The heat laughs as I stand there sweating, completely focused on my task.

In my own little world, oblivious possibly quite deranged.

My problems slip away out there like water soaking into the ground

The dog is in his cage and me in my yard, that's where we can be found.

There nothing more beautiful that happens to me, all those flowers giving me smiles

The bees, butterflies, plants, people and world, in and out all the while

She calls to me, that lover of mine, who whispers to my soul

She tells me I can do anything and have all things I can hold.

I always pretend not to believe her, because I don't want to admit she's right.

It's her I choose, rather than the world, if I really want to have a good fight.

I've never known such happiness, this peacefulness that rests on my soul.

Chasing a dream and doing this thing, trying to reach higher goals. 

I know I am unstoppable, I don't need her to tell me that

But she's just like me and wants me to see, always the big splat

When I fall on my face and she laughs at my disgrace

I find I'm still very much in my happy place.